Thursday, August 16, 2007

boob shot

I hurt my back at work last weekend and I knew I shouldn't be playing tennis so soon with all of the sporadic twisting, but it was perfect weather, I needed the exercise, and I wasn't going to sit at home and watch television, so I decided to give it a try. I warmed up and stretched carefully but as soon as I started, I knew I should probably stop. It was hurting with every swing of the racket. I was pissed, partly due to the discomfort and partly because I lugged my shit all the way to work and then to the court for nothing.

A few minutes in, I served a hard one. Lana was wearing dark glasses so I didn't realize she wasn't looking.

As the ball hurdled toward her she made no move to return the serve. It was too late by the time I realized what was happening, and the ball hit her square in her left breast.

"I'm so sorry", I called across the court. "Are you ok?"

Far from the kind of girl to lose her temper, I was surprised when she froze and then turned to me slowly.

"Maybe if I wasn't the only one picking up balls, I would have seen that coming".

This was in reference to the remark I made a few minutes before about how I was impressed she was actually moving her ass to pick up some balls as I usually have to feed them to her one at a time.

I felt bad that I hit her and so I was probably defensive. And my back hurt. And I knew I shouldn't have bothered coming out to play. I guess I kind of lost it.

"Are you KIDDING me? I just accidentally hit you and you're giving me attitude? You know what, I don't need your shit."

I zipped my racket up and started to gather my things. As I was doing it I knew I was being ridiculous, but I couldn't stop myself. She started to walk toward me.

"Are you really leaving?"

"Yes", I answered, but silently adding, 'unless you say the right thing, even though I should probably stop playing to save my back, and yet I want to play'.

I continued aloud, "I'm not in the mood for this. You would never have said that if it was anyone else."

She stood there for a moment, before she spoke.

"You're right, but that's because I feel close enough to you that I CAN say that. But I shouldn't have given you attitude. I was just reacting to getting hit."

"Well obviously I didn't do it on purpose."

There was a long pause.

"I'm sorry for hurting your boob", I said, unzipping my racket.


chapman said...

haha, you said "boob".
that's rich.

Lx said...

it's a palindrome.
how do you have time to argue
about this junks
when you have to return
135 mph serves?

Rachel said...


PS ...and then I kicked her ass. Not really. But it sounds good.

135mph? You must be missing a decimal point. 13.5mph sounds about right. I wasn't playing Federer.

Have a good weekend boys!