outside of in between

Really I am just a big sentient ball of emotion and passion. It worries me when I overflow to much. If anyone read my posts of late they would see things have been more down than up, although there are many normal moments in between where things feel good. Behind sunglasses I cried all through the grocery store today, and all the way home. I worry that I will never be better. I worry that it could get worse and I am not sure if I can handle that. The uncertainty scares me. I worry that I freudian typed 'patient' instead of 'passion'. What is that? Is it my destiny to be a patient or do I have the stamina to make it and even flourish with the passion and emotion? Maybe in the writing, painting, dancing. My gossamer cocoons.