husbands of the suburbs

I'm a good girl.
I hold your babies.
I let your husband's inappropriate comments slide.
I'm attentive
And just interesting enough.
The wine helps.
Everything seems so much more interesting after a few glasses.
The suburban three bedroom houses.
The two car garages.
And nothing seems impossible to me.
Like how I know there is someone out there for me.

I can do all of the suburban things they do.
I think I could do it with a little extra something.
I've had more time than I wanted.
We'll call it time to come into my own.
In the end I think it will be time that I needed.

And while I can't compete with a 20 year old
There is a small chance that I am still the fish swimming
Parallel to you at the lakeshore.
We could show them all how provincially-minded they have become.
Or we could go numb together in the cold atlantic waters.
The kind of numb that refreshes us; wakes us up.
Not the kind I have grown into these past few years.